Warning: Stuff so emo ahead that it puts Uchiha Sasuke to shame.

You know, I wonder. A lot.

I wonder why I even started talking to you.

I wonder why last year, we started being friends.

I wonder why I even bothered about your presence.

I wonder about these little things about life.

You've never been a good friend, but I tried to make sure I was a friend enough, even though deep down, my disdain for you grew.

At first I thought you were like any other lonely and overly angsty tween, who needed a friend.

I was wrong.

Sure, you needed a friend, but you had friends. You just didn't notice them.

You overlooked your friends, your class, your acquaintances and blamed them for not being there.

You blamed them for being mean to you, blamed them for ostracising you.

You just didn't see where you went wrong.

You didn't bother to socialize, and you blamed others for ignoring your presence.

You didn't bother about others' feelings, and you blamed people for being insensitive.

You felt that no one in this world was superior to you, you were the king.

You told yourself that you were getting stronger everyday, and your ego grew, day by day.

Soon enough, I couldn't stand your bragging anymore, but I kept on being a friend.

I told myself that eventually, under my influence, you would learn to treat people the way you want to be treated.

I was wrong again.

Your ego inflated so much, I dreaded it everytime you talked to me on MSN. It didn't help that when you entered secondary school, you deemed everyone around you as "noobs", "losers", "idiots", "no-lifers", the list goes on and on.

Basically, you deemed yourself better than everyone.

Still, I, as your friend, continued to force myself to maintain the illusion that you were a nice person deep down.

I was wrong yet again.

You were never a nice person.

Maybe loneliness turned you into someone else, maybe secondary school did, or maybe your personal matters did.

Slowly but surely, I knew that the person I had been friends with was just a lie, a facade.

You were a horrible person.

I realised that when my friend confided in me what you did to her, you lying piece of shit.

I tried to maintain my composure and perkiness whenever you MSN-ed me, but my anger and disdain for you just grew and grew.

Eventually, I hated you.

I saw you nothing more as a hormone-infested ingrate with a superiority complex.

You must be muttering to yourself now, "This girl has some guts to mess with me."

I don't have guts; I have pure dislike and anger, maybe some pity.

You poor unfortunate soul.

Now, as I stare blankly at our MSN conversation which simply consisted of you insulting me and mocking my intelligence, my cursor hovers over the red X button, debating with myself on whether to be a friend or just use my head.

I hit the button nonchalantly, and I tell myself the same thing I told myself six months ago as I watched the window close in mild satisfaction.

I was never your true friend.